The Diary of She: Destination Unknown

Today I went for a walk, my usual 35-40 minute walk towards the end of the work day. Sitting at a desk all day gets a bit tiring so why not get up and get active. While on my walk I found myself staring off in the distance with a million thoughts going through my head. It’s normal for me to drift off and think about life, sometimes I even pull out my phone to write down a quick poem or a few quotes. Today I just let the thoughts eat at me. Thoughts of who I am today and who I’ll become in the future. Wondering if I’m sleeping on the present me. Have a truly found myself 100%? I can confidently say, “Not even”. Every other day I’m learning more about me. I’ve become a more positive person once I stopped allowing myself to mix with those who radiated their negative energy onto me. For a moment I thought all life had to offer me was disappointment and drama until I manifested peace upon me. I decided to stay away from those who made me feel less than and focus on the things that made me happy. BUT today during that walk I felt like I was having a midlife crisis and I’ve yet to hit my 30s. I asked myself what is it I truly want? Do I want to stop chasing after my dreams that I was once so passionate about? I was feeling like I knew my mission (write) but I didn’t know my where the destination was or how I was getting there. Did I go left, make a right or keep strutting forward until I reached the unknown destination. What happened if I came to a dead-end? I knew I’d have to turn around but then where would I go? would I have to start from the beginning; start all over again? The hard part for me isn’t figuring out what career I want and will be genuinely happy with. The hard part is figuring out how I’m going to get my writing out there, how I’m going to bring in my audience and how will I meet people to network with. It’s possible I’m terrified of rejection; scared that I won’t have any supporters or that my work won’t be good enough. Sometimes I think I need some reassurance and a shove forward instead of feeling like I’m completely alone on my journey to the world of published writers…

Romance In The Workplace

Office-romance

Have you ever found yourself walking down the hall and you almost bump into a coworker or notice someone you’ve never paid attention to before? Or have you ran into someone in the break room and you start feeling butterflies? Suddenly you look up and see this beautiful person in front of you. From that moment you find yourself attracted and wanting to learn more about who they are as a person but there’s that part of you that’s saying don’t mix your professional and personal life. Yet you find yourself flirting every now and then or find yourself looking a little too long and immediately having to look away when you see them coming your way. There are days you don’t know if you should speak or stay hidden away in your corner of the office. It’s actually kind of torturous.

Anyways this is currently happening to me. I’ve found myself attracted to someone who works in the same building as me. I’ve noticed him for months ever since I almost walked right into him. Besides the fact that he is handsome and funny (I got some courage to speak to him), every time I look his way something in me goes, “I want to learn all about that man.” Now, I’m telling myself I have no intentions of crossing any boundaries but wouldn’t I be if I acted on thoughts of wanting to get to know him outside of the office? Not anything sexual but just wanting to catch a show, go for a walk and build a friendship outside of work. Who knows he may not even want to get to know me in that way so why say anything at all right? Or what happens if a friendship turns into something romantic. Then you have to worry about mixing love and work; the consequences that could possibly come with it.

This conflict I’ve been having with myself got me thinking about workplace romance and that’s where this piece comes into place…

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[New Music] Jhené Aiko – While We’re Young

Jhene releases a new video, a modern day 50 First Dates 🙂

He walks into a diner to find a woman eating and drawing. The man that works their warns him she has short term memory and to stay away but it doesn’t stop him from approaching and building a relationship with her. Towards the end she’s starting to realize he has been with her all along as she looks at her drawings. Now that’s love! A man who spends everyday reminding/showing you what you’ve become no matter the hardship. She was worth starting over with each and every day. YAS Jhené!!!