Reasons I Don’t Date

There’s always that family friend or family member that likes to point out how you never have a significant other or never allow people to get close to you. It can become annoying when you have gatherings and before you even get there you know the questions you’re going to get involve your dating life, the one you may not have. I know for a fact I don’t have a dating life, even though at times I want to experience what it’s like I’m quick to avoid the entire situation.

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I hate saying it but men really are the main reason I say no to dates. I’m sure there are a lot of good ones out there but I tend to do all I can to avoid any man due to the ones I’ve dealt with in the past. Going through months of getting to know a person only to find out they are nothing like the person they portrayed to be is a complete turn off. It’s so much that makes you say to yourself, “Maybe being alone won’t be so bad after all.” I’d rather be lonely than be drained of all my energy by a person that doesn’t want the best for me. Anyway before I start ranting let me list the rest of my reasons as to why I do not date.

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Don’t Take My Kindness for Sexual Advances

“There is no weapon in the feminine armory to which men are so vulnerable as they are to a smile”. – Dorothy Dix

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Last night I went somewhat on a rant after seeing the most unexpected message to come to my phone that whole entire day. I had no clue what I was looking at and I was confused as to why I was being scolded for not being into a guy the way he thought I was? The old me would have looked at the texts that were accusing me of being this manipulative, liar who agreed to go on a date (that I didn’t agree to) and pretended not to know who this guy was when I seen him and I would have immediately cussed out this guy but instead I kept my cool for the simple fact that the whole situation was petty and we have a mutual friend.

Let me give you a little background on how we got to this place:

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With Change Comes Growth

Like a flower needs rain to grow
You need pain to grow

-Mila J

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Today I was talking to a good friend of mine as I always do in our group chat and the topic of change came up. Currently I’m in-between jobs and she believes this whole change I’m enduring in life is coming from the universe and the universe is say, “follow your dreams and gain the freedom and happiness you’ve always desired.” Mind you, the universe, as well as those that know me, have been trying to tell me this for a long time  but I always let my 9-5 and the fear of failing stop me.

Someone once told me that the fear I was feeling was the devil trying to hold me back and I can do nothing but agree with that because it was a fact. Now that I’m no longer working I’m so happy I have all this free time to put my fears behind me and jump into what I love most, creating… Podcast, books, YouTube videos and clothing. Continue reading

Let’s Talk Confidence

I’m back with a new Vlog on my YouTube channel and today I felt like talking about confidence because let’s face, I don’t always have it and part of that comes from the world we call social media. We start to get so consumed into this idea that we are supposed to look a certain way and have certain things based on what people say, post and like.

I’m here to say, FUCK IT! once you find your confidence no one will be able to tell you shit or make you doubt yourself.

Check it out below!

C.O.N.F.I.D.E.N.T
— Read on youtu.be/7jBXdF9XHUk

Entering Into a New World [YouTube]

After a year or more of saying I’m going to start a vlog I’m finally entering the world of vlogging aka video logging (because I know some people have no clue what a vlog is.) I still need to brush up on getting the quality together but today my camera wasn’t allowing it. I also recorded this about 5 times & I may have liked the original better lol but I wanted to give you all a feel of who SHE (me) is.

FYI: for someone who isn’t a big fan of talking I actually got into this once I got into the flow of things. Also I’m open to feedback (ways to improve, topics, etc).

Check out my introduction below and subscribe to my channel for future updates (if you’d like) 🙂

Stop Holding Yourself Back

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It’s crazy that as children we seem to have our whole lives planned out in extraordinary detail:

  • The exact car we’ll drive
  • The college we’ll graduate from
  • When, where and how we meet the man we’ll marry
  • Our dream career that will be handed to us on a platter
  • The gated community we’ll live in
  • The dog
  • The number of children we’ll have and their gender

We have this great life planned and it’s all supposed to happen by the age of 25. BUT what happens when 25 hits and you have only accomplished one or two things on that list and the rest hasn’t fallen into place and you don’t see it happening anytime soon, what do you do?

I’ll tell you what not to do… Don’t get down on yourself and feel like you’ve failed because as long as you’re alive there’s time to do everything you’ve every wanted to. Why let the dreams you had as a child die because you’ve reached a certain age? There’s no reason to. Some of the most successful people in the world have failed time after time and no matter how many times they took a loss they didn’t give up until they won and then won again.

If I based my success off my current age I wouldn’t be considered successful to most people:

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