I’ve been out of work for five month and it not all it’s cracked up to be. I thought, hey, I’ll finally get some time to myself and to focus on my craft. No more spending 4.5 hours on the freeway and more time to focus on my health and my writing. Everything I thought I was going to get to do turned out to be everything I haven’t gotten much time to dive into.
Wait, I lied! The first month of being off was great. I still had to wake up and do school drop-offs but I had time to do other things. I started that YouTube channel, the one I told you guys I decided to delete, I got to go on a few hikes and I was able to take all the naps I wanted. And I can’t express to you the joy I felt not having to put gas in my car every two days. I mean not having a job was great, but of course life had to hit me.
I know I haven’t posted much but that doesn’t mean I haven’t been writing. So, Let me update you on what’s been up with me and just give you a recap of my 2018 as well as what I have in store for this year.
January 2018: I created an online store (TDOS) thediaryofshe.com to sell merch that promoted my book The Diary of She. To date my best seller’s on there are my The Diary of She Crew neck and hat.
February 2018: The Diary of She was released. This was my first poetry/prose book and I couldn’t have been more on a high about it. I haven’t sold many, maybe 200 but it was nice to know there were people out there supporting me.
May 2018: Went to LA with family to celebrate my cousin graduating from LMU and then a few weeks later went to Atlanta for the first time to celebrate my birthday. Looking forward to going back. When I got back to work I found out I was on a new team and moving to a new office in San Jose in June 2018.
August 2018: Found out that I’d be out of a job at the end of the month, which was absolutely devastating because I knew I’d no longer have a steady income but I was also relieved because I was becoming extremely stressed out.
Meet Nas… A man who thought he had it all; success, happiness and love. That’s until his past came looking him in the face, leaving his future hanging in the balance. Will he finally own up to his mistakes or continue to run away?
Find out this Friday, 11/30, when my first novel, “Let’s Be Friends” drops on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and Black Eden Publications.
It’s been a long time coming but I’ve finally decided to create a mailing list. I’ve been thinking of all the ways I could interact directly with my supporters and build an audience without having to make a million post on Facebook and Instagram. Also those social apps didn’t allow me the space to add all the links to what I have going, such as my merch, YouTube channel, this blog, my books and more.
With that said, please subscribe to my mailing list to stay updated on all things, “The Diary of She.”
Today I went for a walk, my usual 35-40 minute walk towards the end of the work day. Sitting at a desk all day gets a bit tiring so why not get up and get active. While on my walk I found myself staring off in the distance with a million thoughts going through my head. It’s normal for me to drift off and think about life, sometimes I even pull out my phone to write down a quick poem or a few quotes. Today I just let the thoughts eat at me. Thoughts of who I am today and who I’ll become in the future. Wondering if I’m sleeping on the present me. Have a truly found myself 100%? I can confidently say, “Not even”. Every other day I’m learning more about me. I’ve become a more positive person once I stopped allowing myself to mix with those who radiated their negative energy onto me. For a moment I thought all life had to offer me was disappointment and drama until I manifested peace upon me. I decided to stay away from those who made me feel less than and focus on the things that made me happy. BUT today during that walk I felt like I was having a midlife crisis and I’ve yet to hit my 30s. I asked myself what is it I truly want? Do I want to stop chasing after my dreams that I was once so passionate about? I was feeling like I knew my mission (write) but I didn’t know my where the destination was or how I was getting there. Did I go left, make a right or keep strutting forward until I reached the unknown destination. What happened if I came to a dead-end? I knew I’d have to turn around but then where would I go? would I have to start from the beginning; start all over again? The hard part for me isn’t figuring out what career I want and will be genuinely happy with. The hard part is figuring out how I’m going to get my writing out there, how I’m going to bring in my audience and how will I meet people to network with. It’s possible I’m terrified of rejection; scared that I won’t have any supporters or that my work won’t be good enough. Sometimes I think I need some reassurance and a shove forward instead of feeling like I’m completely alone on my journey to the world of published writers…